I was reminded of these ads after watching a few games last night:

 

“Why?” you may ask. Well yesterday in the MLB it was a day of absolut(e) slaughter. I will start off with the slaughter that least affected me (in the real world, at least).

Interestingly enough, the case of slaughter (baseball style) that least affected me was probably the worst. The scene of the crime was Citizen’s Bank Ballpark, in Philadelphia. The Phillies beat the Reds 22-1 in this game. Unfortunately, the sorrow I feel for Reds fans everywhere is only half of my problem with this one. See, the Reds’ starter in this contest was Johnny Cueto, a bright young player who has performed well this year, keeping his ERA in the 2.00 range and posting 8 wins. I’m not even sure when he was taken out of the game, I think he allowed 9 or so runs, ballooning his ERA to 3.45. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, aside from being a new favorite player of mine, Cueto is the ace on my fantasy team. But really, should that concern me in the real world?

There was also a case of slaughter to a lesser extent here in Boston. It was brightened only by the glorious return of Nomar,

as the rookie Brett Anderson threw a 2 hit shutout vs. the Red Sox. We lost it 6-0, and all the more depressing were Jason Bay’s continuing struggles, as he struck out once and went 1-3. In the past week he is 2-25, among the worst in the league. This miserable week has even included an 0-5 with 5 strikeouts on July 1. Hopefully the All Star game will cheer him up and get him back on course to take that MVP award from Texeira in the second half.

The final case of slaughter came in Seattle, where Jarrod Washburn threw a 1 hit, 5-0 win against the Orioles, a team that I am actually starting to root for to at least make a little bit of a comeback in the second half. With such bright young talent as Nolan Reimold and Matt Wieters, I’m beginning to really like the O’s.

It was a night to forget in the MLB, at least from this Sox fan’s point of view… (and I didn’t even consider the disappointing 9-4 loss for Kevin Millwood, another one of my fantasy pitchers, as legitimate slaughter)

Thanks for reading.